Everything I Wish I Knew Before Starting University

In this blog, level 2 Fine Art student Leanne reflects on what she wishes she’d known before starting university, highlighting the importance of being ok with spending time alone.

Learning to feel content and comfortable in your own company can make the transition from leaving friends and family at home to a new (somewhat) isolating situation easier. Leanne offers practical tips and tricks to help fellow students deal with/process emotions, sharing how she overcame FOMO (the fear of missing out).

My Self-Love Journey

Everyone always says, ‘university is either the best or worst time of your life,’ and that it can be extremely lonely and isolating. I always had this in my mind, so I set myself the task a year before starting university (primarily in summer) that I would work on learning to love spending time alone. To appreciate the time I spend focused on my hobbies and creating a calm environment where I can process my emotions. This factor single-handedly made my university experience; it created a comforting mindset for the first year. Learning to love spending time alone also allowed me to discover who I was and what my passions were, free from the judgment of others.

I was also able to learn more about my emotional health. The more quality time I spent alone, the more I learnt how to process my emotions by myself, but also how to recognise when to ask for help and what to share. Being able to process emotions is a difficult task, especially for teenagers. Everything seems to always be happening at once, and emotions are heightened. Now, this, plus moving to a completely new place away from home for the first time with the addition of starting completely new friendships, is a lot. Even for adults, it is not an easy task to do. So, taking the time to learn how to be comfortable alone takes a significant amount of pressure away from rushing to create connections.

I’m not saying don’t put yourself out there, don’t go out and meet new people. I’m saying that by learning to enjoy your own company, you don’t feel pressured to go out. In the first few months of university, I didn’t go out drinking or to clubs. A lot of the people I was friends with were doing all these activities (which is completely fine too), but I wasn’t, and I didn’t get fomo. Because I learnt about myself, I knew I wouldn’t have fun, and I was happy with not being there, it just wasn’t my scene. I would have gotten fomo if I wasn’t enjoying my evening alone, now I sometimes even skip events because I would prefer having an evening by myself.

My confidence has significantly grown since spending time alone. I am always going places by myself; I have solo day trips to places I have never been before. And I genuinely enjoy doing them alone. University is about finding yourself; you are with completely new people; you can reinvent yourself. So, take the time to get to know yourself, not for anyone else but so you can look in the mirror and say you love yourself.

Before starting university, I wish I had known how much my self-love journey was going to positively impact my life. If I knew the significance of it, I would have spent more time working on myself. A quick tip! I started a diary one month before going to university. To start with, I didn’t use it seriously, but it ended up helping me process everything so much better, and I am still using it weekly now that I am in my second year. I love being able to see how much I have improved.