Putting it into perspective: how to not sweat the small stuff
Mind management prompts to help you through the final weeks of the semester.
As assessment season lurches into view, it is very common for emotions to fly. You and those you care about will be under a lot of stress to meet deadlines, so it can be easy to fall into emotional traps. I am very guilty of this myself! I would like to share the method I use to put my worries into perspective and get on with my day.
I am a serial worrier and always have been; I am constantly fretting about what people think of me, the work I produce, and my worth in the world. It has taken me a long time to implement this structure into my life, and I am still learning how to pick my battles. Please do not worry if you struggle to use these points all the time. It will take a little while to get used to, but will pay off when you need it to.
You can use these prompts to sort out most situations, but if you are really struggling then please do seek out professional help.
-Put yourself and the situation into context
- How did I get here? Was it caused by an argument, a bad day, ill health? Medication, fatigue, and other stresses can alter your perspective. Take a step back and consider all possibilities.
- Who was involved? Are they people who are important to you? If you find that someone you care about was the cause of or part of the trouble, it can be difficult to admit that they were wrong. Remember: we are all human and we all make mistakes. Our faults come as part of our parcel of existing.
- Was there a particular catalyst? An event, a message, a chain of circumstances? Trace it back as far as you can. Could it have realistically been prevented? Did you even notice that it was happening?
-Evaluate your emotions
- How am I feeling? It is helpful to list these emotions to find common themes. Are these emotions ‘normal’ for the circumstances? Stress is inevitable when writing dissertations or presentations, but are you experience any odd ‘side emotions’?
- Is this normal for me? Emotional trials are subjective, but are the sensations familiar to you?
- Are they getting in the way? If so, to what degree? Feelings are valid, but on occasion we blow them out of proportion. By recognising this, we can help ourselves with getting back on track or seeking help.
-Act upon them
- RESOLVE – Things like quarrels or disagreements can be solved by acting on mistakes. Internal emotional turmoil is something else, but admitting that something is amiss is always the first step. Seek out your creature comforts, and allow yourself to be helped. Sometimes the best way to resolve your problem is just to experience the emotion, and take the steps required to make yourself feel better.
- RE-EVALUATE – In the grand scheme of things, how important is it? Right now it may seem very important, but will it still be causing you the same amount of stress in a week, a month?
- GROW – Take on board the lesson(s) learned. You may not grow from them right away – this is normal. However, always take an experience as a learning curve to find out how you and those around you function. It comes in very useful when the going really gets tough.
This may seem very convoluted, but with practice you will be able to it so quickly, you won’t notice that you are doing it.
Take care of yourselves and those you love during this busy time!
